Month: October 2019

So, here I am trying to figure out the extended passion I’m looking for. This blog has become a lifeline to my soul- it has given me a reason to look at things going on around me longer, and more closely then before- it’s caused me to truly want the best for myself and others because I feel like a weight I had hanging around my dreams has been lifted.

Since writing again I’ve watched life more closely- I’ve paid attention to myself more closely. What I would usually brush aside I don’t- what used to rattle me, I won’t allow.
Here are a couple realizations about strangers, and openness.

Life has given me plenty of opportunity for reflection lately. I had my oldest child get married the first weekend of October. That’s an eye opener. Talk about reflection and having the Kenny Chesney song “Don’t Blink” playing on a continual loop inside your brain. Watching a child get married will cause such a phenomenon.
I also had my youngest child and her family move “home” from halfway across the country, a blessing we never thought could happen but is now a reality! To reference another country song “I’ve learned to never underestimate the impossible.”

Then, a phone call from University of Michigan hospital yesterday to report some not great news on my heart which has been giving me trouble since May….so yes, I’ve been on reflection overload.

So, let’s get back to looking at life closely, really closely. I know it’s easy to just keep things status quo. What’s not easy is to look back in a year, five years or twenty, and see that you’ve not lived your passion. Knowing that you only get one chance at life-ONE! Knowing you didn’t feel like you were worth the effort it would take to be passionate about life is…sad.

I submit exhibit one… I had to travel last month, two flights between Georgia and Michigan. My longest flight found me stuck next to a couple who wanted nothing to do with eye contact let alone conversation- so I napped with my headphones on. For my shorter flight I flew seated next to the sweetest gal, the same age as my daughter. She was on her way back from a business trip in Utah, and we struck up a conversation about work. She is in sales although she really wants to be a teacher. I told her my daughter is a teacher, and she and I spoke about how her mother had taught for thirty plus years, but it’s her mother who had encouraged her NOT to teach because she wouldn’t earn a “healthy paycheck. “
Toward the end of our flight this sweet gal says “I really should teach, right?” It was said out load, as a question but really not directed to anyone. I think she was throwing it out to the universe. She followed that with, “I mean who wants to go through life and not try to fulfill their passion.” She literally says this, to someone whose writing about “passion!”
Kismet!

Here’s hoping she does what her heart tells her to do. Since when was a paycheck with a bigger number on it worth more than a soul that’s fulfilled?

So, visualize your on a plane and you’re talking to a stranger you’ll probably never see again…what’s your best airplane seat realization? What do you admit out loud to strangers you’ll never see again? The realization might startle you. Things we speak out Loud are powerful.
Things we speak out loud to strangers are sometimes more powerful!

I submit exhibit two…. Recently I was invited to join a Facebook group for folks who have had open heart surgery. A week or so ago a gal asked the question “What do you not admit to your family?” The response was startling! I can’t recall how many folks commented, but it was well over one hundred- all willing to tell strangers things they wouldn’t tell their families. The reasons all varied, but very few people said they were an open book to their own families. Me included.

So listen to what it is you tell yourself…listen closer to what you tell a stranger.

Till next time~
Erin

When was the last time you wrote a love letter? 
The craft of writing your feelings out and following through on the delivery of your inner most thoughts is a dwindling practice. Folks don’t rush to their mailboxes hoping to find their names on an addressed envelope these days. One hundred years from now nobody will stumble across a treasure trove of letters that their grandparents wrote between one another- the future generations may never know how and why a couple stayed together over struggle or shared their fears…heartbreaking.

I’ve come to realize that most of my prized possessions are heartfelt words. I still have a few cards from years gone by, but mostly I love the messages that are thought out by the sender themself.  Sometimes Hallmark just doesn’t hit the mark. 

Thinking back, this love has evolved over a long period of time. As a child, my sister and I would walk to the local Hallmark store, we would spend forever looking at all the stationary sets, Snoopy, Holly Hobby, flowers, hearts, stars… they were endless. On one trip we bought ourselves wax sticks that you could light and let the wax drip onto your envelope – the wax sticks came with a metal seal and we could choose our design. We literally wrote letters to everyone we had know back in Illinois just to use these sticks. My love of letter writing was born. 
I kept in touch with friends who I had moved away from (dig deep and think back pre home computer, pre Internet) I’ve had friendships that have lasted my entire life because of the written word. It was just how you stayed in touch back then, and I’ve never really changed my ways.

 Later in life, my husband, then fiancé would write letters from boot camp, and I had vowed to write him every day. I believe I actually did- sometimes more than once. The letters I got from him still sit in my bedroom almost thirty five years later. They are in the same shoe box that they’ve always been in. I’m a sucker for nostalgia remember! 
I suppose I should go through them and put a few in frames- it might be fun to see them out. 

I have three framed letters on display at my house, one was written to my Mom from my husbands great Aunt. Nothing particularly “special” about it which to me makes it priceless. Her mention of my kids who ADORED her and she them. I found a way to fancy it up a bit years ago and framed it. My daughter was almost four, she’s now twenty seven. The test of time.  

Another is a typewritten letter from my sister in law who reached out to me awhile after my mom passed away. She sent me a beautiful note about God noticing the tears we shed and sent along a glass bottle. Since  the arrival of my Grandbabies the bottle has been put up, but the letter remains framed in my dining room.  

Last but certainly not least, a note my mom sent me during her cancer struggle. She was a strong, private woman who always told you how much she loved you, and now that she’s not here I get to see this framed message every day and be reminded of her love. 

I must say, I’m pretty dang good at reaching out. I love to send my Grandkids letters and I still write my husband letters. Sometimes silly ones that I’ll pin up in the medicine cabinet…sometimes serious ones about life and it’s struggles. These will someday be part of our story. 
So, in my pursuit of a passion filled life I’m reminded that it matters. It matters that the mailbox is sometimes filled with love~ not just bills. It matters that when someone is having a hard day you took the time to write an encouraging note. It matters that others feel your love for them in this moment in time when feelings are usually only electronically expressed. 
Generations from now your Great Grandkids will not be seeing your IM or your Snapchat. They will not know that you had triumphs and troubles that you reached out about.  They won’t know that the Grandma with the white hair and strict rules was once a romantic who dreamed of running away and living with Papa in a cabin by a stream and that he liked that idea too.      

  Let them find that out, give them something to discover. 
Today my friend, in an effort to stay connected and to show your love for your family do yourself and them a favor…Write a love letter.

Till next time- Erin

Sometimes first guesses are correct. I had a middle school teacher who used to say  “If you don’t know the answer, go with your first guess, it’s usually right.”
When starting this blog I was going to be me searching for what it was that would fulfill my soul. Because I was raised in a household where you worked and worked I had gone in my mind to all the businesses I’d love to try. The list is like rifle shot- scattered.
I’d love to own a candy shop/ bakery with my Grandkids someday. We’ve named it, spent hours talking about it and saved hundreds of  photos of things we must learn to make. Then there’s a horse trailer turned into a bar, building a retreat, possibly running a tree house rental, etc, etc- rifle shot remember. 
Here’s the thing, once the blog was up and running I realized that writing was the true passion and I began to share some stories, most can tie back to passion (much like a Seinfeld episode it all comes back around) but some you’ve all been gracious enough to just read and let it be about the love of the story. 
So… enough about all that- today we are doubling back to the original idea. Showcase some passions. 
Todays passion: Baking/Memories  These are my Cream-puffs~ the recipe my Mom used my whole life. Yesterday I spent the day baking because tonight is my son’s wedding rehearsal dinner and these babies are dessert! 

If you don’t want to read on and see the work in progress here’s the recipe- they are promised to make your house smell heavenly! 

Preheat oven to 350 degrees (I usually triple this recipe because I make my cream puffs BIG, and they always get eaten) 
1 cup water. 1 stick butter 1 cup flour 1 tsp vanilla.  4 medium eggs Tub of cool whip. 1 cup Powdered sugar. Cooking at 350 45 min -1hr
Boil water and butter~ once boiled add your cup of flour directly to the pot and mix quickly till it forms a ball/remove from heat. Add vanilla (I add extra because I love it but you do you) Your dough is now done time for eggs! Add one egg at a time stirring fully. 
That’s it!  You’re done with the hard part! 
Put on a cookie sheet in large drop fashion. I use a giant table spoon size scoop. You’ll bake these for 45 min-1 hr. I allow mine to cool on a rack when done then put them in an airtight container if I’m not serving right away- Once the Puff is cooked and cooled you’ll cut the top off evenly, scoop out all the soft dough from the lid and from inside the puff- fill with Cool whip (never use the stuff in the can, the filling will turn liquid on you)  Refrigerate until you’re ready to serve. 
Put a cup of powdered sugar in a small handheld sifter and generously sprinkle it over Puffs just before serving! Beautiful and delicious. 

So, here I am the day before my son gets married. I don’t know where the time has gone but I know I am blessed to be in this day. I know that I am missing my Momma being here to celebrate~ giving her a shout out with making her yummy treats. Maybe someday these treats can be served in my sweet shop. My hope is the recipe will be passed on to my kids and Grandkids, and that perhaps they’ll always be made on special occasions, and reflection will take place. 

I promise no tears fell in the dough, but I promise they were shed. 

Till next time- Erin